Day 12: "You Are A Great Example...of What NOT to do in Tae Kwon Do"

When I was in 6th grade or so, I was in the park when I overheard.

I thought it would a brilliant time to unleash my  inner ancient Asian fighting skills that I learned from watching Bruce Lee films and show off.

But no..I didn't anticipate the following to happen.

I was defeated and humiliated by an invisible foe.

It wasn't until a friend would start taking Tae Kwon Do, that I would learn the fighting techniques of the motherland...

For awhile, I was the total disgrace to the name of Tae Kwon Do.

Since both my parents worked, they couldn't take me to class. Luckily, the Tae Kwon Do school wasn't too far from my house. I would ride my bike over for every class.

It was really a great learning experience. I learned how balance myself, my life and have some sort of discipline in my rebellious youth..(heh)

However, I wasn't that great with Tae Kwon Do at the beginning.

I was just a weak, little girl and when you mix that with no coordination whatsoever...

things are bound to get interesting.

And since I was the only girl in the class, I think it made my situation a lot funnier.

Here are some of the best moments that I can remember.

At first, I remember I really sucked at breaking boards.

I was good at doing various kicks, like front and roundhouse kicks..(just my aim was terrible)

My punches were good...cept for the "Uppercut" punch...

To simply describe it, its like you're trying to punch someone underneath their chin.

Well, I kept accidently punching myself a lot.

Sadly...it still happens.

Don't get me started on the "Flying Jump Kick"...

In Tae Kwon Do, its important to have great balance and coordination

(Things I sadly lacked)

So in order to improve this, our master would set up these large, cylindrical punching dummies in a row.

These cylindrical dummies bases were made out of plastic, which were filled with either water or sand. This made them very heavy, but they still move back and forth when you punched/kicked them..

or extremely wobbly when you ran across the tops of them.

I was horrible at this. I was filled with such dread whenever our master made us do this.

Everyone else couldn't wait for me to fail.



What you're supposed to do.

 Two things would always happen to me.
1) I couldn't get past the first one and i'd fall off. Tears forming in my eyes from the pain coming from the fall and the humiliation...

 

2) I'd fall inbetween the dummies and get stuck.

The worst humiliating moment in my Tae Kwon Do days, came from a rubber, male dummie named Bob.

Bob was like a cylindrical dummie, except with a mans torso instead.

I hated this asshole. The guys in my class were able to punch him hard enough to make him move.

Kinda like those clown dolls that you punch but they come back to hit you

But for me...He was too heavy for me to make him budge with my feeble, pansy punches.

Except one day...I was able to make him sway from my punches.

In fact...he really swayed...

In my excitement and happiness I turned around to face my master and classmates. Desperately seeking some sort of approval from them for once.

But...that bastard Bob...wouldn't go down so easily

He came right back up and attacked me from behind. That low-life sonofabitch

This was probably one of the stupidest moments in my life.

I didn't know that my master, either out of pity or to further humiliate me, had emptied out some water from Bobs plastic base. This made him easier to move/wobblier.

There was only one moment in my Tae Kwon Do life, where I could redeem myself.

At the end of the day, our master would make us do some sort of game.

One of them was called Sumo Wrestling.

Basically you had to hold a giant pad and ram yourselves against eachother to push eachother out a ring.

I remember it was my first time playing. So the master told me to watch the boys play first.

What I think was really going on was that it was actually a mini tournament for the boys..

The winner would be able to crush the delicate, little pansy that I was.

Finally it was my turn. I calmy held up my pad and looked at my opponent.

A big guy, with an obnoxious grin on his face.

I pretended to look scared

Then I saw him run towards me...

I waited..not moving an inch.

When he came close enough...I made my move...literally.

I moved over to the side at the last second and watched him basically throw himself out of the ring.

Brain over brawns, moron...muahahaha.

It was at this moment, my master and classmates had some respect for me..

after chasing me around the parking lot first.

eh, better than nothing.

With practice I got better at Tae Kwon Do.

Unfortunately, the owner of the school had to relocate because he couldn't keep up with the lease. The new location was too far for me to ride my bike and my parents couldn't afford to send me anymore.

I really miss it. One of these days, I would love to take it up again.

I remember being really shy when I started learning it, but as I learned the moves and learned to yell with each punch and kick.

It was the beginning of a much more confident me emerging

Which I think is just as important as physical strength.

Maybe even more.