Day 68: Lets Talk About PMS!

PMS

.::insert the cringes/yowls of a thousand dying cats::.

I hate that combination of consonants.

Scientifically it stands for "Premenstrual Syndrome" 

and its formal definition is: physical and emotional symptoms before menstruation that include bloating, water retention, pelvic pressure or cramping, headaches or migraines, irritability, mood swings, difficulty concentrating, and food cravings.

But PMS can also stand for..

Pass My Shotgun

Psychotic Mood Shift

Perpetual Munching Spree

Puffy Mid-Section

People Make Me Sick

Provide Me With Sweets

Pardon My Sobbing

Pimples May Surface

Pass My Sweats

Pissy Mood Syndrome

Pack My Stuff

Poor Me Syndrome

Potential Murder Suspect

(I didn't make up this list, these are terms I've found floating around the internet)

No wonder men of the past didn't think that we women couldn't handle anything. They must have thought we were too psychotic to handle anything...at least thats my theory.

Being a woman wouldn't be so bad

if we didn't get our periods. 

But guess what this is reality.

and this is a message to all of those poor people who are inadvertently affected by this.

Your friends, family, your dog, that little old man walking slowly in front of you.

Those people who don't know what the fuck is going on with you.

But its...really not our fault..

Its a weird feeling. 

Physically, Its like having someone punch you in the gut, repeatedly, 

or having a pitchfork being driven into your abdomen and having it twisted around bit.

Emotionally...its like having all your best friends gather around you and tell you that they actually  hate you.

and the horrible thing is, well at least for me, I'm not aware of how i'm behaving.


Sometimes it makes us women go from this

To either this

Or this

It makes me more sensitive than usual..

Guys might not be able to understand this, but we girls do..

We..understand exactly that the heck is wrong with you.

Some people wouldn't want to put up with that nonsense.

But your true friends will set you straight again.

The type of personality one gets during this lovely time also varies from woman to woman.


Some people, like myself, who are normally outgoing and sassy 
become quiet, sensitive, and contemplative.


others may be become a lot more emotional than usual and cry over little things.


and in rare cases, they'll become crazy, psycho bitches.
(I think it depends on the situation she's in)


The length of time that this lasts also varies as well. 


So the next time you're in the presence of a woman who's going through this, 


Don't be alarmed.


Just...be careful.


it'll be over soon.


and remember...


she may not be aware of her actions.


(I mean...I think you'd go a little crazy if you had to experience what she's going through)

Day 67: Crystal Moon's Anger Management Methods.

Do you ever have those days when you feel really defeated?


 bringing you down and making you unable to think clearly or fight back?


When slowly...all the things that have been bothering you 


are slowly building up inside..


making you into this angry, ticking timebomb.


I think it happens to a lot of quiet people. People who have a hard time expressing anger or hurt and just shut themselves up and deal with it.


until they just explode.


I've learned from experience that its not really healthy to do that. 


So here are some things that I hope will help you cope with anger that helps me.


1) Talk about it/resolve the issue.


If someone is bothering you, talk to them about it. 
If they don't even know that what they're doing is wrong, don't hold it in til you explode and lash out at them. You might have been making it worse than it was.


2) Write it down.


Organizing my thoughts helps me. 


3) Sleep


4) Take a walk.


5) Scream.


6) Listen to music.


7) Cry.


8) Dance.


9) Treat yourself.


I feel that these are things you should do the moment you get pissed and not just bottle it up inside.


but if you ever feel like exploding,


take a huge breath 


 breathe slowly.


step away from that moment and walk away.


Take some time to yourself and just think about the situation. Is it really something to get that mad about or is now the best time to deal with it.


Hopefully you can avoid saying or doing something you'll regret.

Day 66: A Day as a Leftie

While I was in 7th or 6th grade, I went to a church retreat in Pennsylvania for the weekend.

My parents forced me to go, I guess it was because they wanted me to make some Korean friends to influence my behavior...(make me more Korean)

While I was there, I somehow go to know two girls, Hannah and Rachel. 

and we somehow ended up playing 'Truth or Dare'

And for some reason, I chose dare.

I suppose they could have done something really bad for me to do. 

But, they made me do things for the rest of the day...

with only my left hand. If I lost, I would have to give them each 10 bucks.

I thought I'd be able to do it...we were only riding canoes and singing and such, 

When would I use my hands extensively?...right?

Then later on in the day, I heard from the youth group leader that we were going to have a sports activity/contest.

 Shit.

We were going to play handball, volleyball, soccer and bowling. 

We were supposed to be broken up into 2 teams. I felt bad for the people stuck with me. Hannah and Rachel were on the other team. 

But I didn't want to give up my money so quickly.


Luckily I didn't really know anyone in this group, except those two girls, for them to know I am actually right-handed.


But still, that didn't stop anyone from thinking I was severely, physically handicapped or something.


Handball was a joke...I kept missing or not hitting the ball hard enough


Volleyball wasn't so bad. 


Soccer.. piece of cake


Bowling...major fail.


My group lost and at the end of the day I won the dare..


but I didn't feel like a winner..

Day 65: Foundation Year. Semester 1: Formation of the Kimchi Krew.

Since this would be my last semester in Parsons


I often thought about my first year as a student here.


In Parsons, you have to take whats called 'foundation classes' for a year. These classes are meant to teach the basics of 3D and 2D Design. After that, you are able to choose what major you want to specifically go into.


I thought this was the perfect school for me, an indecisive person.


I couldn't afford to live in the city, so I had to commute everyday (click here to learn horror stories about commuting) I thought I could handle it. 

yea.


I remember my first day in Parsons. I was just a disoriented Staten Island girl who went into the city only a few times in my life at the time. The city was this huge, loud unknown thing to me.


When I first entered 2 West 13th Street, or the Sheila Johnson Design Center, it was still in construction at the time. I remember that the ground floor was covered in these huge wooden panels. 


I went to the fifth floor of the building, in a small room in the back of the wood shop. There I saw my Section. (Freshman are broken up into sections) 


I remember being really shy around this time. 


But I didn't realize that the people in this room would stay by me for the next few years to come.


The first person I talked to was Elena. I was pretty much forced to talk to her though, because we were doing some sort of 'orientation' game and we were supposed to learn about eachother. I learned that she was from Taiwan. 


Later on when we finally got our class schedules and room numbers, I thought I wouldn't see Elena again. When a girl came up to me and said hello, I was surprised, I don't think we had ever met..


But it was Elena, I just didn't recognize her. 


(way to fail Moon...)


We had most of our classes together. 2D, 3D, Drawing and Lab. 


Later on, I met Lawrence. Lawrence was in my mind at the time, a very flamboyant individual. 
(The first time I met him, he was wearing white pants, a white shirt with a rainbow zebra, and carried a white purse


For about a month, Elena and I thought he was either metro or gay. 


then one fateful day...

We then met Megan, a shy girl from California..
at least..we thought she was shy...


Priscilla sort of forced herself into our group (just kidding <3) We were going out to eat and she had asked to join us. I was just teasing her and said in what I thought was a sarcastic tone "No you can't join us!"


but she did anyway.


(it wasn't until many years later that I learned that she really thought I meant it and just went along with us just to spite me...nice)


The four of us were a group in 3D and 2D classes. 


in our lab and drawing class, we met a guy named Bill. I thought he wouldn't want to hang out with people like us because he looked like a metal rocker. 


I don't remember how it started, but I remember talking about this group of Korean guys I knew that called themselves "The Kimchi Krew" and for some reason thats what we called ourselves.


I'm so happy that I got a chance to meet them. They made life at Parsons so much fun. In an art/design school, there are a lot of people who seem rather stuck up and don't try to get to know people who aren't within their social sphere or don't have the latest in everything.


I'm so relieved that I met a group of such wonderful, down to earth, people.


So in a sense, Foundation year didn't just mean learning the basics of the design field to me.


The people that I met, became a strong foundation for me to grow as a person. 

Day 64: My First "Paid" Job.

While I was growing up, 

my mother always stressed to me the value of money.

and when I was around 13 or so, my mom would always ask me every other day, 

<>

I don't think she realized that not many people hire 13 year olds for work these days.

Eventually, I got a babysitting gig from a friend of a friend of a friend.

I guess they were pretty desperate.

Or maybe they thought that Asian kids are so well behaved that we're not going to do steal anything or whatever.

It was summer and I remember walking to their house from my parents store.

When I got there, the mother greeted me with a huge hug and introduced me to the two kids. 

Tyrone (8) and Sheena (7)

She explained to me all the rules of the house. Don't turn on the air conditioner. That they only use it when the whole family was home. To save money (It wasn't so hot that day anyway, just humid) . Don't let them have any cookies. Don't let them play too many video games and make sure they do their homework. (They were in summer school)

But she explained to me that they're extremely well behaved kids. 

<>

So I shouldn't have to worry too much...

right?

They watched their mother pull away from the driveway and then turned to me. Staring a bit.

All of a sudden, Tyrone said to me 

<>

When I said no, he started to sing "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" over and over again. I tried to ignore it, but he would be right next to me as he sang. Locking myself in the bathroom was out of the question because he would turn on the air conditioner anyway.

I was going to lose it though. It was humid...uncomfortable and here was this kid singing loudly in my ear. 

I gave in. 

It was all well and good, they played video games and I read.

After awhile, I turned off the air conditioner and told them that it was time to do homework.

<>


They just looked at me as if I was crazy. 


I tried to be tough and say that if they didn't do as they were told, i'd call their mother.


Tyrone just looked at me and said.


<>


I sat there on the couch, trying to figure out a way to persuade them to do their homework.


Then it hit me.


Treats.


I know that their mother said no cookies...but she didn't say no Skittles right?? I had some in my bag. Plus she wouldn't be able to find out if they had candy but she definitely would know if they didn't do their homework.


When I got up and told them that I'd give them Skittles if they finished their homework, they ran to their rooms to get their backpacks.


They finished it within an hour or so. I gave them each a handful of skittles. 


BIG MISTAKE.


I understood why she didn't want them to have cookies.


They were bouncing all over the place. 


They got bored of the PS2 and wanted to play a game. 


I thought we'd play Uno..


They wanted to play 'Hunter'


a game like tag, only they were hunters looking for prey..


me.


I was told to hide...but where could I hide in this small home? 


I went into their coat closet..



I could hear them say "We're going to eat her...yessss"


and sure enough, within seconds, they found me.


I tried to run, but I hit my toe against the table, slowing me down.


They tackled me to the ground and started pummeling me with their fists.


I struggled to get them off, but they clung on, laughing at my pathetic attempts.


Finally I pretended I was dead. They poked me. Called my name..I didn't respond.


Sheena started crying and Tyrone was pinching me. But to no avail.

Then he started crying...


I felt bad, but these kids needed to learn how to behave, 


So I pretended to cough.


Sure enough when they saw that I came back to life, They hugged me. 


and I told them that I was almost a goner, but I was still weak. So, if they misbehaved even more, I'd probably die again. 


So for the rest of the evening, they behaved. 


Just drawing and watching a movie.


When their mother came home, she was pleased to see that I hadn't destroyed the house and that her children were behaving. 


Later on I got a phone call from their mother, saying how disappointed she was because I had broken all her rules. The kids must have told her. 


After that I was never called again.

Day 63: i Gotz an Edumacation.

I was reading the paper today and a headline caught my eye.

"College Schmollege: Are Todays College Students Dumber?"

Its about a college professor compiling all the responses that, according to some, 

say that theres something wrong with America's education.

(click to read this amusing blog here)

That may be true, but I am not an analyst or an expert on the subject of America's education system.

Of course students need inspiring teachers to motivate them. 

However, I think its not all up to the teachers to drive the students.

Its something that the students themselves have to deal with on their own. 

Nobody can always push you around and make you study or succeed.

Of course its case by case, however, I don't think that one's grades should reflect on how intelligent or dumb someone is. Everyone is better at something than someone else. 

I feel that it all depends on how motivated they are to push themselves. Perhaps we shouldn't be categorized as dumb or intelligent, but rather either as motivated or lazy.

And I feel thats what people should really focus on. There are people that are probably so motivated, but don't get the work and the help they need to understand. While the people who do get all the answers right, are only like that because someone else is pushing them and not themselves.

Maybe the reason why people did better in college was because there weren't as many distractions back then...cellphones, video games, the internet?

But again, I am a student myself, so perhaps I sound really naive or ignorant because I'm not an expert on this topic. I am simply an observer.

And from personal experience, I know I can do better when i'm motivated and badly when i'm not.

So maybe its time to not immediately blame the teachers, professors or distractions for our failures.

but at ourselves.

(what do you think?)

Day 62: "Whatever Doesn't Kill You, Can Only Make You Stronger"

I often wondered what it would be like to forget certain memories. 

Memories that hinder me from moving on or making better decisions.

How would it be done though? 

Maybe it could be as easy as taking a pill.

Or visiting a clinic that got rid them through a complicated procedure.

Maybe a surgeon could cut open my brain and take out the memories I don't want to remember.

and at the end of the procedure...

How would it feel to lose those memories.

Maybe all i'd have to do is sleep it off and not remember a thing then I wake. 

It could be like an electric shock.

Or maybe the memories linger, slowly disintegrating, until we only remember fragments of it til they're gone completely.

But I know that science isn't that advanced enough and probably won't be in my lifetime.

Thats why science fiction is so fun. 

Its something that we all have to live with. 

Theres always amnesia, but you'd lose chunks of memories that you may want to keep.

Later on in my life, I realized that you have to compromise. Theres no way you can forget specific memories. You have to live them. 

and I know that there are people who've had much worse happen to them in their lifetime. 

Incidents that no one should ever go through.

Which makes me think about my own life in a different perspective.

Maybe i'm naive or that i'm just saying this because I know I can't change things, but I'd like to think that things happen for a reason. 

As the saying goes. "Whatever doesn't kill you, will only make you stronger"

and I'd like to think I am now. 

I don't think that there is anyone lucky enough in this world to only have good, happy memories from the moment they were born until they die.

And even if they did, how would they know what to do when a crisis comes along?

or for that matter, 

How would they know what happiness is? 

Its almost like light and dark.

Without light, there is no darkness.

and without darkness, there is no light. 

Perhaps the compromise or the relationship between them..

is what makes us human.