Day 60:Its the Beginning of the End...Holy Crap.

(I just got back from babysitting some kids..it was unexpected so I unfortunately have to keep this short)


Tomorrow is the start of another semester.


my last one.


I am incredibly nervous, yet excited at the same time. 


I have a hard time explaining how I feel without ending up stuttering. 


and right now, that is exactly what i'm doing.


I'm looking back at my last three and a half years here.

3 1/2 years might not be a lot be you or anyone else. But I don't want to think of time as something meaningless. 

Though they seem like a blur to me.


So many things happened between the day I stepped into the small room in the lab on the first day..


until this very moment.


I saw the world in a different way, experienced love, heartbreak, sadness


 and pure joy.


I saw my potential and the extent of my own creativity if I pushed myself.


Lived a different life and met wonderful people.


Pushed my boundaries, broke down my defenses, and let life take over me.


I was at the lowest part of my life but now I am content and grateful for where I am now.


I'm not going to lie and say that I'm not scared of what will happen to me at the end.


Except that i'll probably say to myself.."now what?"


But knowing me, that won't probably last for too long. 


I'm not that scared to the point that it renders me useless and incapable of doing anything..


To put my feelings in such a way that you might be able to understand
(or rather, the best way I can describe them myself)


I don't see my life as this giant, black tunnel or hole anymore.


I see it more as a giant white canvas or wall. 


And its up to me how I want the finished product to end up.


But my main goal for now is to live far from here. 


So maybe I shouldn't think of this as the end. 


I should think of it more as a beginning.


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To the readers/followers: I want to thank you for following and supporting my blog. I know that recently that my posts haven't been that humorous. I'll be honest and say that there are days when I have a hard time finding any humor in my life, but writing what I'm feeling each day helps me. And I hope its helped some of you.


So I want to thank you.